"When you are deep in your own thoughts, you are behind enemy lines"
I heard that quote once and the more I thought about it, the more I found it to be true. My thoughts are not always good. Last night for instance, as I was sitting at dinner with Mike I began to entertain an accusational thought towards him (and if the truth be told, even more towards myself). IMMEDIATELY James 4:12 came into my head with "There is one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you -who are you to judge your neighbor?" I have been memorizing the book of James so I should have been thrilled that scripture was readily on my mind but, you know, Scripture is only good if you apply it to your life and your thoughts! I am sad to say that I pushed it out of my head and found myself in a downward spiral towards the pit of despair...first I started thinking about how I do judge too much...and then how that makes me a bad wife...and then the thought of what else don't I measure up to? And the thought of a failed interview...then something as trivial as failing to pitch strikes at our last softball practice...failed time management...fear of failing as a parent (if and when that happens)...failure after failure after failure came to mind and pretty soon I was just staring into space with tear filled eyes wondering how I got here so quickly. Dinner had started out well and ended not so well. Poor Mike. He started with a good dinner companion and ended dinner with one that he didn't know how to respond to. In the middle of my thoughts I felt the Holy Spirit ask "What are you clinging to? Why are you not clinging to me?" Good question. How do you answer that? "Because I'm a selfish little vapor who only cares about my pitty parties?" Great excuse to give God. Thankfully, God is forgiving and loving and can bring about peace in an instant. Thankfully my husband is quick to forgive me and quick to hug me when I need it.
Today has been good. Started with a 7 mile run. Went better than I thought since I hadn't run at all this past week due to a knee injury from softball. 16 weeks left until my next marathon. Hard to believe this will be my 5th race. I never would have believed I had the ability to run like this. It has been a good growing experience for me. This race will also be fun because we are getting a group together and running together. The more the merrier!
After running, I made my way to EarthFare and spent too much money, but hey, we'll eat really well for a little while, lol:-) I've been trying to eat better and I can really tell a difference in how I feel overall. It's really not that hard. I try to eat at least one piece of fruit at breakfast,I've been substituing fruit and vegetable slices instead of chips in my lunch, drinking more water and trying to limit sweets (very hard for a chocoholic like me though!).
I really must get off the couch now and do some housework, study my Sunday school lesson for tomorrow and run a few errands.
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